I know you’re guarded and wary of anyone that wants to get close to you.
I know you think how can someone love me when I can’t even learn to love myself?
I know they’ve taught you to hate parts of yourself.
I know it’s a battle of you against your worst demons, as you replay in your mind things people have said.
The word abuse is one that’s familiar but you won’t ever own for yourself.
Because emotional abuse comes with no bruises, only the ones inside your heart that people can’t see. And memories in your mind of being fucked with and used because they needed something of you. But they never stopped to ask what do you need on them.
So you gave until there was nothing left to and they walked away taking what they wanted.
And you’re left unsure about what it is you can give people because you feel so empty.
I know it feels like you have a broken heart, that’s questionably beating.
A long stream of people who have hurt you and the unkind things they’ve said and done, go unspoken because no one needs to know.
And I know your eyes are tired because you spent some time crying, only that too is a secret.
No one sees the moments you crawl up into a ball, as black tears run down your face. You just want this emptiness to be filled. But you don’t complain. You wipe your tears and carry on.
I know physically and emotionally, you’re drained because you don’t know how much more you can take.
You keep your head down and stay quiet because you feel invisible.
But I want you to know people see you. And they don’t see someone damaged. What they see is beauty.
And I know you do your makeup but you don’t think you’re that pretty because a lot of people have made you feel like you weren’t.
But it was them who was ugly, not you. And your beauty stems much deeper than something on the surface.
You’ve become strong because you had to.
You stand tall because you’ve been knocked but you’ve learned to fight back.
I know you feel weak but you give others strength, without even realizing it.
You’re closed off and guarded and scared because you have experienced the emotional impact of being destroyed with words and actions. So you choose never to treat people like that.
Your beauty shines through and everyone sees it but you.
Your eyes are tired but I look at you and see sympathy.
You aren’t smiling all the time but I see compassion in your gestures.
What you think is a weakness is really your greatest strength because you lift others up, even though many people have knocked you down.
You say you’re broken but I see someone willing to give what’s left of themselves to make others whole.
You say hurt and I see the way you heal people because you know what it’s like to be there.
You say you don’t trust people yet you let everyone in with open arms and be their strength.
And you don’t think you can be loved but you love people deeper than anyone I’ve ever met.
Because you use love as a way to heal.
So when you tell me you can’t simply be loved, you’re right. Because the love that will be in your life will be anything but simple.
It’ll be everything you never even knew you wanted. Because you deserve so much more than what you’ve gotten in the past.
So trust me when I say you aren’t too damaged to be loved. You just deserve someone as rare as you.